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IMPACT Throwback Throwdown II Review - December 18, 2021

12/18/2021

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By Graham "GSM" Matthews

Santa Claus Attacked IPWF International Commonwealth Television Champion Sex Ferguson

I'd say Ferguson was tailor-made for the ​Impact Provincial Wrestling Federation, and he is, but I have to assume the IPWF was largely inspired by WWE's Southpaw Regional Wrestling, which he was a part of with that character. He was interrupted Giuseppe Scovelli Sr., portrayed by Scott D'Amore, who told him he'd be having a match with Santa Claus in the main event. D'Amore's character is also the father of commentator Josh Mathews' character, an obvious play on the McMahons.

Chad 2 Badd def. Bill Ding

Much like Gallows' Sex Ferguson character, Chad 2 Badd is perfect in the IPWF environment. I'm pretty sure he used that name in Southpaw as well. It's crazy to think The Good Brothers weren't involved in the last IPWF show, but I guess they still would've been in WWE at that point. All that aside, this was actually a quality match that was light on the silliness. Bill Ding was portrayed by Trey Miguel, who wrestled a different style than usual but still adapted well and had a good showing while getting "Bob the Builder" chants.

Rhythmic Warriors (Johnny Swinger and Mikey Singer) def. Sunday Morning Express

Rhythmic Warriors consisted of Johnny Swinger and some old dude named Mikey Singer while Sunday Morning Express consisted of Ace Reporter and Editor-in-Chief. One of them was Chris Sabin, but I forgot which name belonged to him. This was a lot goofier than the opener, but it was what it was. To his credit, Mikey Swinger moved around the ring pretty well. This is probably the only show I'd be fine with him wrestling on.

Frank the Butcher def. Rip Rayzor

Having Rayzor (Ace Austin) accompanied to the ring by Rusty Iron (Gia Miller) was cool because they're a couple in real life and I don't think that's ever been acknowledged on TV. I honestly wouldn't mind them being paired up on the show down the road if Miller were to ditch being a backstage interviewer. At any rate, this was solid stuff. Rhino also used his Frank the Butcher character in Southpaw. Despite winning, Rayzor attempted to murder him afterward by slashing his throat, so there was that.

Georgia Cobb def. Lady Bird Johnston

Jordynne Grace (Cobb) feels like a fantastic fit for this type of show. She plays the perfect throwback women's wrestler. I can't say the same about Havok (Johnston), but at least Grace won. The match was whatever. Some of Havok's offense looked beyond dumb, but then again, that was the theme of this show, so I shouldn't have been surprised. This was passable and had the right result.

Giuseppe Scovelli Jr. def Quincy Cosmos

I think a lot of people (myself included) tend to forget that Josh Mathews was on Tough Enough and used to be a wrestler. He's done some stuff here and there over the years, but as a pest heel commentator, he was always limited with what he could do, but he got to showcase his skills here and hold his own against Rohit Raju, who looked like a slightly ridiculous version of Stardust. Too bad his wig fell off halfway through. This was much better than it had any right to be.

Pelvis Wesley and Colonel E. Corn attacked DJ 2Large

Moose playing a happy-go-lucky dude named DJ 2Large was hilarious, just because we have never seen that side of him in his career. Hell, he was always serious in Ring of Honor as well, so seeing him interact with the audience so much and do something of a sing-along with them was great. Then you had John E. Bravo playing Corn, who was the manager of Pelvis Wesley (Heath). Did Heath do something similar to that in Southpaw? Either way, it was an obvious knock-off of Honky Tonk Man. This was dumb fun.

“Hard” Harry Hall def. Badlands Bart in a 4-Corners Bullrope Match

I'm not a big fan of Bullrope/Strap matches, but I guess it made sense for this show to have one. I'd say Harry Hall (portrayed by Jake Something) was the correct winner, but it didn't really matter. They made the most of the stipulation and it crowd was into it. My favorite part of the whole thing was the execution of the finish, which was well done. Lawrence D, who portrayed Bart, is another of those guys who feels perfect for the IPWF, even more than the actual IMPACT product.

Ima Belle def. Rusty Iron

This was set up earlier in the show when Iron and Belle got into it backstage. Belle was Deonna Purrazzo and the character felt like a mix of Liberty Belle and WWE's Lacey Evans. We already saw Iron in the corner of Rayzor, but I didn't know she'd be wrestling on this show. Did Miller used to wrestle before she joined IMPACT? Like IMPACT's version of Quinn McKay from Ring of Honor?! Not only that, but she was impressive. Of course, having an opponent the caliber of Purrazzo didn't hurt. Post-match, Frank the Butcher made the save for Belle after miraculously recovering from his wounds.

Tim Burr def. Eric “The Red” Wood

Josh Alexander portrayed Tim Burr, which is just a fantastic name. Eric Wood was W. Morrissey. Similar to Moose as DJ 2Large, it was a treat to see Morrissey do something completely different than what we've seen from him in IMPACT this year. This felt like the "hoss fight" of the show and was more of a match than most of what we got on this show, so that was appreciated. I was surprised to see Wood lose decisively, but it's not like Morrissey will be hurt by it considering this show isn't technically "canon."

Jazzy Fitbody def. Wanda The Werewoman by Disqualification

I believe Madison Rayne also portrayed Jazzy Fitbody on the inaugural IPWF special two years ago. She plays the character really well, but the Werewoman thing was just stupid. Again, I realize this entire show was meant to be silly, but it's not like this was remotely entertaining. They also had The $237,000 Man out there representing Werewoman and his pre-match promo felt like it only existed to kill time. This was the weakest part of the show in my opinion.

S.T.O.M.P. in Paradise (GI Broski and Brian Bone-Crunchin) def. The Russians (Stalingrad Strangler and Sergey the Siberian)

You could tell Matt Cardona and Brian Myers were having an absolute blast as S.T.O.M.P. in Paradise. I know they said they wouldn't team up anymore after getting released from WWE in 2020 and they even feuded in IMPACT for a few months this year, but it was cool seeing them reunite for a one-off on this show. The match was more competitive than I thought it would be and it was entertaining.

Santa Claus def. Sex Ferguson in a North Pole Street Fight to Win the IPWF International Commonwealth Television Championship

Downtown Daddy Brown (Willie Mack) pulled a Dusty Rhodes by disguising himself (in a Santa costume, no less) to challenge for the title we were told he lost to Ferguson in an Empty Arena match. He revealed his true identity afterward and the commentators acted shocked. The match itself was more of a brawl than anything and felt like one of WWE's holiday Street Fights turned up a notch. It was a fitting main event for this show and the post-match celebration was well done.

Overall Show

They said it maybe a million times, but this special was sponsored by Pabst Blue Ribbon and the beers were incorporated into multiple matches. If you saw the last IPWF show IMPACT did two years ago, this was exactly what you'd expect, though this was a three-hour Impact Plus special and not a holiday edition of IMPACT! Wrestling (it aired Thanksgiving week in 2019). I don't know that it needed to be that long, but there was enough enjoyable stuff to make it worthwhile. Would I recommend you go out of your way to watch it? No, unless you're really into this sort of stuff. It's not for me personally, but this exceeded my expectations and the talent having fun with it made it more fun for me as a viewer.
SEE MORE: IMPACT Reviews
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