Rapid Delivery Pete (Rich Swann) def. Rip Rayzer (Ace Austin)
Swann's gimmick was that he was a pizza delivery man who wrestled with no shoes on while Austin looked like a discount Shannon Moore. This could have been a really good match if they took it seriously, but it quickly became apparent that they were going for laughs and didn't intend on having an actual competitive contest. The crowd are up Rapid Delivery Pete, so there was that.
Downtown Daddy Brown (Willie Mack) Attacked International Commonwealth Television Champion Julian Cumberbun (Ethan Page) and Sonny Sanders (Sami Callihan)
Callihan's cosplay of Jim Cornette was hilarious if you're aware of the real life bad blood between the two. He actually played the part of Page's manager pretty well. Speaking of Ethan, he was perfect as Julian Cumberbun and was super believable in his role. Mack was very likable as Downtown Daddy Down and was the last man standing in this segment after Cumberbun and Sanders attempted to attack him.
The Hard Workers (The Deaners) def. Xcessive Force (Fallah Bahh and D'Lo Brown)
I've wanted Brown to come out of retirement for years, but this isn't exactly how I envisioned it happening. Hey, it was better than nothing, especially since he and Bahh made for a pretty entertaining tag team. I wouldn't mind them becoming a full-time tandem on IMPACT! Wrestling. Even The Deaners were better here than they normally are. The Hard Workers picked up the victory, but Xcessive Force got the last laugh by crushing their hats post-match.
Johnny Swinger def. Buck Gunderson
Interestingly enough, we saw this exact same match last week on IMPACT! Wrestling. Their names weren't changed at all and Swinger once again beat Gunderson with ease. I guess the idea is that Swinger came up in this era of wrestling and thus his current character fits right in? At any rate, here's hoping their "rivalry" ends here and this is the last we see of these two against each other.
Jazzy Fitbody (Madison Rayne) def. Anges Beerheart (Alisha Edwards)
Rayne had a fitness gimmick and I loved how she incorporated that into her offense. For example, she stepped on Beerheart's back as if she was working out. I got a kick out of that. As for Beerheart, I honestly had no idea that was Alisha because it looked nothing like her. After Fitbody's win, Sebastian (portrayed by Jimmy Jacobs) tried to convince Fitbody to join him, only to get rejected.
The Rough Riders (Tessa Blanchard, Jordynne Grace, Havok and Alexia Nicole) def. Tim Burr (Josh Alexander), Jim Nasium (Dez), Bill Ding (Trey) and Ray Strack (Wentz)
Everybody here was so damn fantastic, but especially The Rough Riders. Between their promos earlier in the evening to their performance in this match, they were my favorite act on the entire show. The Rascalz and Alexander were fun foils for them as well. I'm not always huge into the intergender stuff, but this worked as a comedy match and the crowd was completely behind it.
Muscles McGhee (Brian Cage) def. Kongo Kong in a $3,000 Body Slam Challenge
I rejoiced when I found out over the summer that Kong was gone from IMPACT, simply because he never added anything to the product and I can't remember many (if any) quality matches he had. With that said, fingers crossed this was a one-off and he won't be brought back after this. Mr. Atlantis (whoever the hell that was) was supposed to answer the challenge, but McGhee came out instead and slammed Kong down to the mat for the three thousand bucks. It doesn't get any more old school than a body slam challenge.
Colt McCoy (Eddie Edwards) def. Gama Singh in a Blindfold Match
Singh took out McCoy's eyesight three weeks earlier, so the stipulation was fitting. I don't think I've seen Singh in action before, so if they were ever going to do it, it might as well have been on this show where he didn't have to do much. Despite Gama receiving help from Dada Singh throughout, McCoy managed to reign supreme. He, along with Giuseppe (Scott D'Amore), were attacked by The Soviets (Michael Elgin and Madman Fulton) afterward.
Downtown Danny Brown (Willie Mack) def. Julian Cumberbun (Ethan Page) to Win the International Commonwealth Television Championship
The show was filled with matches, but this was the only one that could actually be considered competitive. Sanders interfered at various points, but it backfired in the end and Brown won the title. Brown and Cumberbun had a really nice main event that featured the perfect mix of athleticism and entertainment. Brown taking the title and the rest of the roster celebrating with him was a feel-good moment to close out the night.
IMPACT Provincial Wrestling Federation was basically their version of WWE's Southpaw Regional Wrestling mixed with NWA Powerrr, studio setting and all. Although it was total comedy, it was a refreshing change of pace compared to what we usually get with IMPACT! Wrestling, especially since a filler show would have aired in its place anyway (complete with the campy Turkey Bowl crap they used to do every Thanksgiving). More importantly, it was obvious the performers were enjoying themselves, and as a result, I had fun watching it.
Leave a Reply.