By Carson Koschik
We start off the show with the same Royal Rumble video package we get each year. I'm not complaining, since it's an amazing video package and there really isn't any thing you can do differently each year. After the video package, we go to a backstage interview with Matt Striker and Ryback. Ryback still needs a little work on the mic, but he's not so terrible that it takes away from his character. He also does a damn good "John Laurinaitis on steroids" impression. As usual, we start off Main Event with the main event of Main Event that should be in the actual main event of Main Event and not in the opener. I'm trying to get more and more confusing with that each and every week. Cesaro comes out and does the usual "I love America but I hate America" promo. Ryback's music hits and he comes out to the ring to his fake pyro. I'm still waiting for Ryback to be an actual match. Since he debuted, his only actual competition has been CM Punk. Not to take away from Cesaro, but the two have faced before and Cesaro either gets squashed or gets counted out. They really need to start putting Ryback in actual long matches, because we have yet to see his in-ring endurance.
We return from commercial to a match already in progress. Good back and forth action in the beginning, something that's rare to see in a Ryback match. I've noticed that Cesaro uses a lot of headlocks in his matches. I guess he was thinking that if he could out-Uppercut Orton, he could sure as hell out-Headlock him. Soon he'll be trying to out-baby oil him. Can't wait for that. Cesaro gets tossed to the outside, but refuses to re-enter. The Miz gets up from commentary and throws the US Champ in the ring. It was a little weird since the match just kept going, and a spot like that usually ends in an almost immediate finish. Should have saved that one for later. As expected, Cesaro runs out (for real this time), and gives Ryback the count-out victory. A little bit of a sucky finish, but it's nice to see they actually want to protect their United States Champion instead of treating him like a low-card jobber.
After a good ol' Raw Re-cap, it's time to start our main event tag team match. The Usos are already in the ring as the Rhodes Scholars some out. Damien Sandow cuts one of his usual promos of awesomeness, with Cody Rhodes throwing a few words in. Even though I really like the Rhodes Scholars, I feel like it may have taken Cody Rhodes back a step. Every year is supposed to be the year of Rhodes, and hopefully 2013 will finally be it. The guys deserves to be a World Champion. Maybe he'll get the Money In The Bank briefcase this year. Some good back and forth action to start off the match, with the Usos eventually taking control. Rhodes Scholars take away control from the Usos after a lot of frequent tagging. Match is meh so far. After some quick reversals and tags, the Rhodes Scholars beat the Usos after a decent match. Nothing really happened that was captivating and the finish was lame, with Sandow just sacking one of the Usos with the turnbuckle, a spot that happens in every match ever. Well, Main Event was decent again. Mostly video packages this week.
Make sure to follow me @SmarkInProgress for up the minute complaints.
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